How do you worship?
Is it by blasting some of your favorite Gospel tunes, or are you a silent worshiper? Just giving praise to God throughout your day?
I think I’m a mixture of all of the above. Sometimes I turn on the tunes and I just let them guide me to those moments in God. I let the Spirit flow and I sing (badly) to the songs until I can’t bear to stand any longer.
Where tears fall, voice cracks, silence takes over, and all I can do is sit in his presence overwhelmed at the realization of how broken I am and how strong He is.
Sometimes I sit in wonder at how His unconditional love for me is real, and there’s absolutely nothing I need to do to make him love me more or less. It is the complete opposite of how my life dealing with humans are. Everything is conditional in some sense, and to wrap my head around God’s unconditional nature still boggles me.
There’s not a right phrase or prayer that could get me any closer or further to and from God. He sees and knows it all.
But the people pleasing side of me that I continuously seek deliverance from, can’t help but to think I’ve failed at my relationship with Him when I haven’t picked up my Bible in a few days. Or I haven’t said a lick of prayer in a week or thanked Him enough.
No, that’s not how this works.
If I truly believe the unconditional love of God that I feel while worshiping and praising him, then I should know those nudges to pick up my Bible and spend time in His presence isn’t a space of punishment. It’s a space of grace.
It’s like God is saying, “hey, it’s been a while, come spend some time with me.” Imagine if my earthly father were to do the same, would I drag my feet to do it? Heck no. I’d be like “okay, bet. When and where?!”
So, why is worship so hard to want to do sometimes? Besides the emotional toll it can take starting out, but you feel so free after the fact. What is it that we’ve allowed to convince us that praising our God is too much work? That pressing the power button on the remote to binge another show is far more worthy of our time than the one who created us?
That’s something to think about.
But, as for me right now, I am praising the God that loves us even if we don’t love Him back. I’m praising the God that continuously provides when I thought I’d be completely homeless. The God that surprises me with just how faithful He is and how much He’s moved in my life. To the God that has shown me out of dark places, protected me from the seen and unseen, that has (and still is) developing me every day, to the God that couldn’t care less what I can do “right” but just that I’m doing it.
That is the God I serve, and that is the God I want people to know. That is where my worship dwells. Where “He must become greater; I must become less.” a
What makes you worship? And is it part of your daily routine?
XX,
Tanaya
Crowned & Chosen 
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